When we are really busy, we sometimes dream of the day when we can stop and do all the things that we have postponed. We see ourselves on golf courses, having snug dinners with friends, playing with grandchildren, and finally doing the travelling that we promised ourselves we would do.
We neglect to think of how big a change that will be or how it might affect us.
The Two Paths of Retirement Planning
Think about it. First, you move from a fairly structured environment at work to little to no structure. This includes your time, how you structure your meetings, meals, when you get up, when you leave – many, many parts to this structure. In retirement, you shift from tightly scheduled meetings to nothing on the calendar unless you hop into the driver’s seat to put something there.
Second, you move from being part of a work community made up of coworkers, partners, referral partners, vendors, associates, members of business groups, etc. to the fewer interest groups who may not have as much in common as you previously thought. Even worse is the feeling that you don’t fit because you don’t conform to a larger norm.
Many think that it will be enough to travel, be with grandkids, and work on fitness or a sport, like golf. The reality is that they get a year out and are bored stiff. At that point they are like fish out of water because their community have somewhat evaporated. We never even consider the impact of this.
Remember the Significant Changes
If you want to know how much this could rock your boat, consider a significant change that happened in your life – take one- No children to children. Think about how you felt when your 2 year old first learned the word no and proceeded to teach you how to retract all the judgements you made on other parents with misbehaving children before you had your own.
Your Network
When you retire, you move from an active business network of coworkers, referral partners, vendors, etc. to the personal ones that may not be as robust. It falls on your shoulders to create more, and you may not know how or where to find them.
This is a significant amount of change for one person to deal with. Add the reactions of family members to a more continuous presence including spouses, and you spike that mix even more.
My mother was fond of saying: “For better or worse, but not for lunch.”
This is why having a strategies in place BEFORE you retire will yield great benefits.
It Helps to Have a Process
Creating a focused exploration of understanding where you have been, what you love, your skills, strengths, values and how to connect them in your new life are some things and people to put into place before you jump. It helps to have a process and a group with whom to work through it.
You might say to yourself: “I have plenty of interests, I won’t need to plan. I’ll be fine.”
Ask a few people who have already retired if that is a good idea. My guess is you’ll get an earful.
Times of change are never easy. And, this is a truckload of change.
Cultural Attitudes towards Aging Have Not Yet Caught Up
Added to that are the often out of date attitudes of society which contribute to more isolation, kids who are adults but not old enough to really understand how momentous that type of change is and how if affects individuals, and the other pressures of health, energy, shifting to a fixed income, etc.
If you ever valued planning in your work life, you can probably imagine how helpful a group and a guide to find the right paths that give you pleasure, connect you to the right kind of intellectual stimulation, service, and fun. The additional bonus is you get a community cohort without any floundering to find one.
Don’t Wait until your retirement date is in sight. Plan early so you can start creating that brilliant next chapter.
Our next Reimagining Retirement Group will start in early November.
For details, please email: dale@shareyourcourage.com
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